Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 6, 2014 14:18:28 GMT
I've stopped buying velcro.
It's a ripoff.
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Post by Red Or Dead on Nov 6, 2014 14:31:08 GMT
A three-legged dog bursts into a saloon and says....
"Right, which one of you shot my paw?"
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Post by Hammy on Nov 6, 2014 20:29:21 GMT
A blonde and brunette were talking when the brunette said," I've slept with a Brazilian."
"You slut", said the blonde. " How many is that?"
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Post by StrikerMo on Nov 7, 2014 11:57:53 GMT
Q: Who made the first soft drink?
A: Adam -- he made Eve's cherry pop
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Post by Jie on Nov 7, 2014 13:52:24 GMT
First woman on the Moon:
"Houston, we have a problem."
What?
"Never mind"
What's the problem?
"Nothing"
Please tell us?
"You know what the problem is."
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Post by StrikerMo on Nov 7, 2014 14:03:43 GMT
What did one of the blonde's legs say to the other one?
Between you and me we could make a lot of money!
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Post by Red Or Dead on Nov 8, 2014 8:21:04 GMT
I met a girl in the park the other night, there was an instant spark between us and I swept her off her feet.
As we lay there in the long grass making love, I thought to myself......
Damn, that tazer gun was money well spent.
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Post by StrikerMo on Nov 8, 2014 8:51:51 GMT
Q: What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?
A: Your job still sucks!
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Post by Red Or Dead on Nov 8, 2014 9:51:21 GMT
The kids in a classroom were asked for homework to write down an item that their family may need.
Next day a variety of things were mentioned by most of the kids like a new laptop etc
Little Johnny , who else? claimed that his family didn't need anything.
The teacher asked him to explain and he said that the night before his older sister came home with a new scouse boyfriend and his Dad said....
"Well that's all we fucking need now, isn't it."
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Post by StrikerMo on Nov 8, 2014 9:52:18 GMT
Q: Why can't you play Uno with a Mexican?
A: They steal all the green cards.
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Post by Red Or Dead on Nov 8, 2014 10:15:03 GMT
What do you call a pregnant scouse girl?
............a dope-carrier!
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Post by StrikerMo on Nov 8, 2014 10:43:22 GMT
Boy: "Want to hear a joke about my dick? Never mind, its too long."
Girl: "Wanna hear a joke about my pussy? Never mind, you won't get it."
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Post by Red Or Dead on Nov 8, 2014 10:46:06 GMT
Q:What did one sagging tit say the other?
A: If we don’t get some support soon, people will think we’re nuts!
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Post by Jie on Nov 8, 2014 11:04:30 GMT
A man was walking his dog through the graveyard when he saw another man crouching behind a gravestone.
"Morning!" he said.
The other man replies, "No, just having a shit."
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Post by StrikerMo on Nov 8, 2014 11:04:55 GMT
Q: Why was the guitar teacher arrested?
A: For fingering A minor.
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